You Slept With How Many Women? OMG

The month of May was clearly a month of spring fever induced internet searching here at Deliriously Divine.  My top three search engine terms:

1. Boob shapes with 51 searches sending people to DD looking for boobs (that includes you, John  Hayden)

2. Saggy Boobs with 25 searches

3. Old Lady Sex with 23 . I want to proclaim loud and clear that Ms. Divine here is not a) an old lady and b) having sex with me is not the same as doing it with dried up, old relic!!!

Of course, we’re not only about sex here.  I write on other topics and people are finding me with other search terms. The most popular non-sexual (I hope) term? GOAT.

Some people say love makes the world go around. Or maybe it’s sex that makes the world go around? Hard to say.

For no particular reason, let’s segue.

Well, it’s about sex. I had dinner with a dear friend, a friend with whom I was enjoying all the benefits (until the new prospect).  He cooked for me–who doesn’t adore a man who does the NYT crossword puzzle (in pen) and cooks softshell crabs?  Over dinner, and working our way through a bottle of wine, we started talking about sex and our former lovers.  Being friends, and having a certain level of intimacy, the conversation was easy since there are no worries about offending or scaring off or ruining a potential good thing. As, an aside, I’ve never had a relationship quite like this…it’s wonderful and easy and my recent announcement that the benefits part was over or at the very least on temporary hold, was graciously received ( I told him well before he planned the evening). So, we let it rip and starting sharing our list…. Wow!  It was fun. He clearly eclipses me in the sex partner category. We tallied our whole life numbers as well as our post marriage(s) numbers. I’ve been married once, he’s gone around twice. I didn’t think to add in men with whom I’d been more than once but at different points in my life… I think they only count as one? Or maybe not?  I have 2 of those.

The conversation touched on our need for connection and how that is often translated into sex. And, we talked about goal driven behavior and it’s place or intrusion on sex lives. It was the most open conversation about sex I’ve ever had with a man, in that we talked about the underlying emotions. Fabulous.

Yesterday I discovered Dear Prudence, on Slate.com, and coincidentally I found this video, check it out!  Dear Prudie, My Boyfriend Has Slept with Everyone.

Needless to say I shared it with my friend.

Today, I’m going to take a few minutes to jot down the actual list of men… Just ’cause. But I’m not sharing.

Sexy, Saggy Boobs, Part 3

So, why are all the people in the world searching the topic of boobs? I have a few theories.

1. Old ladies want to find the magic elixir to get rid of sagging boobs.
2. Dirty old men just want to see boobs, and saggy is ok with them. (most of the searches are for boobs, not specifically saggy ones)
3. We’ve become such a boob-driven society that hundreds, nay thousands of people actually sit around doing internet searches for boobs and breasts.  How sad is that?
4. Babies have finally become internet savvy and are doing their own searches. And, they are really the only legitimate ones to have a vested interest in breasts.
5. Bra designers are searching for 2 things: the perfect breast to use as a cup model and the saggiest boobs to use for before and after photos.  Before: naked saggy things. After: the well clad breast as shown in a tight sexy sweater.

This will be my last ever boob tagged post. I would love to be known for my sexy breasts (though this hasn’t been all about me….for once) but I think my reputation should be broader than that! Don’t you?

Who Knew… Boobs, They Make the World Go Around

Wednesday is now going to be recognized as official boob day. First of all, Kim Kardashian was all over the news, of sorts, for her agonizingly sad photo shoot. As best I can reconstruct she did a photo shoot, in the nude, for W magazine. Her tits and ass were to be creatively covered with something artistic. And, guess what? Her nipple is showing. She’s upset… but really, who gives a *bleep.

And, Wednesday was Boob day here at Deliriously Divine. Over 115 people did a google search for “boobs’ and landed on my blog.  Who knew so many people, dare I say men?, were searching for boob shots? We’ve been the specially featured blog on the WordPress tag page: Saggy Boobs and all kinds of people came to visit.

Elsewhere in booby news? Well, the legit news is again saying that there is an increased health risk for women with breast implants. I do feel sorry for women w/ breast cancer who have legitimate reasons for wanting breast implants. But, for the rest of the artificial D cups in the world- Oops!

Boobs in general still seem to garner attention, make men sit up straighter, pants seams strain and cause all manner of people to talk, stare, drool and utter obscene thoughts. I didn’t set out to try and capitalize on a nation’s fascination with breasts, and really I find the preoccupation with women’s breasts irritating at times. Though I admit to doing my own, subtle flaunting at times. But yet… here it is.

From now on, just think of Deliriously Divine as the boobs chick!

 

photo from Med India website